Monday, August 23, 2010

A kiss is never just a kiss...it's a smackdown for a rose!

Hello everyone! I couldn't resist coming back to blog about the funniest, craziest and slam the front door shut most addictive reality show to air during the summer months! I laughed, everyone in the house cried, and it still ended with the resident hottie Gia being sent home too soon. You knew it was coming though, after last week's crazy turn of events! Grab your libation of choice and let's get this party started!

I think I speak for everyone else that watched last week when I say we knew the writing was on the wall for Gia after she backdoored Craig M. and gave Wes the rose, sealing Craig's fate in the house. The dust barely settled on the last rose ceremony when the girls started analyzing who had the swing vote in the rose ceremony. Nikki admitted to being the one who voted Craig M. out, causing drama with Gia. Gia already knows she has a huge target on her back, and that several of the men want her out. Gia feels that Dave, Kiptyn and Kovacs will vote her off, so she needs to win the next challenge to save herself. I never thought a rose would double as a life jacket for someone who was on a sinking ship, but in this game, grab it and hold on for dear life, or risk getting sent home to the real world!

The house guests find out that the new challenge is a kissing contest. Sounds like grade school to most people...although I doubt that kiddies were kissing like this in school! I was surprised at some of the people who stepped up to this challenge in the hopes of winning the rose! Then again...$250,000 is a massive incentive for someone to give a lip smackdown for the cause! Hold on to your Chapstick, playas...it's gonna be a sloppy ride!! ;)

The girls were up first to be blindfolded and get kissed by the guys, and then would vote on who was the best kisser from the group. I loved how Natalie said she would kiss any of the men in the house for $20.00. That girl is crazy and hysterical! Some online even say a little bit cheap and trashy, but at the end of the day, it all boils down to the money and who will represent for the cause. Money talks...or screams bloody murder in some instances. Gia, on the other hand, was really uncomfortable, as she has a boyfriend back home. Ah, Gia...sweet Gia...why bother coming on a show like Bachelor Pad, where you know there will be hookups, drama, romance and kissing!? Definitely not the place for someone in a committed relationship! Natalie totally nailed it when she said "Don't come on a show where there will be romantic competitions and cry about it." Strike two, sweetheart. Better step up or start packing.

The kissing competition was a riot...very steamy...and sloppy as hell! It was so obvious that the girls were really getting into the kisses from Wes, Dave and Jesse B. They were very confident about their kissing abilities and it paid off. Nikki and Natalie especially liked the steamy kisses. I knew Natalie would...she was enjoying everything about the challenge! LOL. I have to admit, I haven't really been a huge fan of Wes since Jillian's season of The Bachelorette, and Dave and his man code drove everyone crazy, but Wes has started to grow on me. Maybe it's the mad crush he has on Gia...or the fact that he adds drama to any situation. Dave is just ridiculously hot. Period. Man code long forgotten...LOL! As for Jesse, I don't know a girl around that didn't have a crush on him during Ali's season that blew up into mad lust when he came onto this show. The guy is insanely attractive...add a layer of sweetness, and all the ladies turn into mush. I love it! Hope this sweetie sticks around for a while. :)

Sorry...I got severely sidetracked! Let's talk about the other guys and their performance. Did anyone else notice that they didn't show too many of the kisses from Kiptyn and Kovacs? Naturally, they showed Kovacs kissing Elizabeth...you knew her head would spin in both directions over that steamy buss. I am still trying to figure out how these two hooked up! The girl comes off on television as the reincarnation of the Exorcist that has a nasty run in with Glenn Close's character from Fatal Attraction. I know that we shouldn't believe everything on TV, as it's part of the drama...but sweetie, you look like a hot, messy freak to everyone watching the show! They also showed Kiptyn and Tenley's "first kiss". Aaaahhh...my sweet little Tenley. I adored her on Jake's season of The Bachelor and I am also one of the people who hoped that she would meet Kiptyn and they would end up together. I just think that she is a bit too jealous and territorial (well...as much as Tenley could be!). Let's face it...this is a show where someone will win $250,000.00. If they want to hook up before or after the money is won, go for it. In the house, it seems like you do what you have to in order to keep your eye on the prize. Anything goes DEFINITELY applies on this crazy show!

It would be so wrong for me to forget to give Jonathan the resident Weatherman an honourable mention for his performance as well. Jonathan is not finding any love in this house, and it carries into the kissing challenge as well. Elizabeth took it way too far with the gagging after she kissed him. I won't go into detail about this, but the girl could take a lesson in class. Seriously. Get over it and play like a big girl. When the show plays back for everyone to see...it won't be pretty and actions speak louder than words. Or gagging noises.

Jonathan, on the other hand, was beyond excited to be able to kiss the ladies in the house. I loved the reactions he had from some of the steamy kisses, especially Natalie and Peyton. Shame he couldn't have been able to have that cold shower he wanted and needed! Poor Weatherman. I always like an underdog...but you were outplayed and outkissed in this game, buddy. I see a cute weather girl in your future...she's out there...I promise!! ;)

I wasn't surprised at the fact that Ashley bailed on the competition. As a teacher, it's understandable that you want to portray yourself as a good role model for the kids you teach, and that's cool. I respect that immensely. However, if you know what the show will be like and the fact that there is a possibility of having to deal with romantic challenges and possibly compromising situations, why bother coming on? Not a good way to put yourself in the running for the coveted prize at the end...just sayin'.

Gia bailing on the challenge was another huge surprise. The fact that she came on the show while in a committed relationship was also surprising. Gia would have known that there would be situations like the kissing challenge she would have to deal with. On top of that, why bail halfway through the competition if you decided to participate? She had to know that the guys would kick each other out of line to kiss her!! The girl looks like a supermodel...why not enjoy the challenge and the kissing? Instead, we saw weak kisses that were watered down out of respect to Gia, according to her. BOO. This is a competition for a huge pile of money...do what you gotta do, or go home. Plain and simple. Sink or swim..and you better swim hard and step up to any challenge thrown your way. I'll come back to Gia later.

It was time for the girls to step up and kiss the guys. My girl Tenley came out, guns blazing and threw down a serious kiss on Jesse B. I honestly did not think she knew how to give anything but butterfly kisses! I was fighting the urge to brush my teeth a thousand times during the challenge, but I was giving virtual knuckles to Tenley for being a willing participant and remembering why she was in the house and on the show. Well done, Tenley...well done!

I have to talk about the hot mess that was in the form of Elizabeth's kiss for Jesse B. Was that a slam dunk, or a kiss? I thought she was going to knock him over! As Wes said, it was violent. Totally appropriate, given this situation and the person giving the kisses. Wow.

After Gia bailed on the competition, she had a breakdown and mentioned how everyone was acting like a porn star and that she would rather be sent home because she had a boyfriend. Again...why go on a show when you have a man in your life? Bachelor Pad is just how it sounds...a place where there can be potential for crazy games, hookups and a ton of drama. Why leave a relationship to get thrown into temptation? It didn't make any sense. I really like Gia, but she was digging a really deep hole for herself that she wasn't going to be able to get out of without a ton of help..enter Wes! That guy was practically drooling over her.

After all the kissing, dissing and rehydrating took place, the voting took place for the best kissers. Dave and Peyton took first place, getting a rose and a date with three people of their choice. Dave had the first date, and was able to take three of the women to Las Vegas. Dave chose Nikki, who he says has class, Krisily and Natalie, who is ready to get crazy and God knows what else with him! I can't imagine her as the Bachelorette. I think it would be like Big Brother...where you could watch on Showtime and see The Bachelorette After Dark! You just know that once this show ends, Natalie will end up on another reality show. I see it happening! ;)

The foursome head to Sin City, straight to the Mirage and the Bare (topless) pool. They have the place to themselves, and Nat is ready for some fun and action. Needless to say, once she whipped off her bikini top, it was a no brainer who would receive the rose and chance to stay in the fantasy suite with Dave. The other girls were sent back to the mansion, and Natalie and Dave spend the evening getting to know each other on the overnight date. They come back as a secret couple, so that's probably what they talked about in the room. Sure...that's what happened...they talked. Honestly, who cares what happened. It's Bachelor Pad. It's a game of anything happening in any given situation.

Next up is Peyton's date with the men she picked - Kovacs, Kiptyn and Jesse B. I love that Jesse got excited that he was chosen for the date, as he always had a crush on Peyton. The three of them take off for some drag car racing, leaving Tenley and Elizabeth back at the house feeling the green monster coming in to rear it's ugly and jealous head. Ladies...it's a game. Let the boys be boys and have fun. Get over it. They can buy you something pretty with part of the money they have a chance to win at the end of this show! I am tired of seeing Elizabeth crying for every little thing too. Pass her a tissue and tell her to get over it. It's reality TV. You're there for a good time...not a long time. Have fun and don't sweat every little thing about Kovacs!

I won't dish too much about the date...I think Peyton already knew that Kiptyn and Kovacs had their loyalty to Tenley and Elizabeth. The focus on this date was definitely on the chemistry between Peyton and Jesse. I like them together, and think that they have potential to be a couple outside the show. There is talk they they already are...and if that's the case, good for them. They seem like they compliment each other well and have the same laid-back personalities. Hard to find on a show like this. Jesse gets the rose and offer to stay in the fantasy suite (aka - master bedroom in the house. ABC, could you not spring for a suite at a boutique hotel nearby? Hope you step it up for next week's dates!!).

I want to ask if anyone else gagged over Wes singing that infamous song again to Gia...but the better question to ask is who DIDN'T gag!? Wes...that act was played in Jillian's season. Recycling your game is tired, especially when it's for a girl in a relationship. In any event, there is no doubt or question that Wes and Gia had a strong connection. The question is how it was defined. For a woman who has a man in her life, she had no problem snuggling up to him in bed...as friends. Whatever...I can overlook that...what I can't ignore is the Shakespeare comment! Wes is a modern day Shakespeare...but better and cuter! How many times will that come back to haunt you, girlfriend!? It's part of every Bachelor Pad blog online...so I had to join the cool kids and throw in in mine too. That's the line of the night and the benchmark for future episodes. Thanks for leaving your stamp on this episode. Funny as hell. I appreciated the giggle!!

I had to give Wes some credit for running around like a chicken on crack, trying to get the girls to break up the couples in the house and vote out some of the men who are key players in the game. In the end, it didn't matter, as the rose ceremony brought the demise of the Weatherman and our pinup girl Gia, who lost in a tie breaker against Elizabeth. The forecast is still sunny, but without our very fashionable diva. I have to say, I am really surprised she was cut this early. Just goes to show you that love from the houseguests don't always come easy...especially from Dave, who gave the deciding vote. Dave was upset Wes put him in the difficult situation of having to be the one to vote out one of the ladies. You know that there will be fallout from that next week!

I don't know about you, but I am already excited to see what happens on the next episode! This show is sinfully good, decadent, crazy, and insane fun. Exactly what the doctor ordered to pimp up our Monday nights. I hope you enjoy reading this blog as much as I love to dish about our guilty new pleasure in the Bachelor franchise! Take care and see you next week!!

Until next time...XO

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